I Love My Car

NEW CARD GAME: Ay Caliente!

RULES:
-Players are dealt 5 cards. One player receives 6. The dealer decides which person gets 6. The person with 6 cards goes first.
-A card from the deck is turned over. Players must either 1) Match the Suit, 2) Match the card numerically, or 3) Play a card one number higher of any suit.
-If the number is matched, the next player must draw a card before they can go.
-If a player cannot play on a card, they must draw two cards. If they can then play with one of the drawn cards, they may. If not, they must say "No caliente."

AY YI YI!:
-An AY YI YI is when three of the same number have been played.
-A double (ex: two 9s) can be played only if the player before has put down the same number (a 9). This is an AY YI YI!
-If one player puts down a number (8), then the next player puts the same number (8), the next player must draw a card. BUT, if they are able to put down the same number again (8), this is an AY YI YI!
-The first player to shout AY YI YI! chooses another player to draw a card.
-If multiple players shout AY YI YI, they must rock, paper, scissors to AY YI YI!, the symbol revealed on the final YI! The winning player wins the AY YI YI and chooses who draws.

AY CALIENTE!:
-When a player has one card left, they must shout AY CALIENTE! before each player's turn.
-If they are caught not saying AY CALIENTE!, they must draw a card.

BUENOS DIAS!
-After a player has won and is the AY CALIENTE!, the phrase becomes BUENOS DIAS!
-If a player has one card left at this point, they must say BUENOS DIAS! before each player's turn.
-If they are caught not saying BUENOS DIAS! or if they say AY CALIENTE! instead, they must draw a card.

After the BUENOS DIAS! has won, the player with the least amount of cards is The Shuffler for the next round. They must shuffle the deck throughout gameplay until the next Shuffler is crowned. The person with the most amount of cards at the end becomes the next dealer and chooses who gets 6 cards and goes first.

SPECIAL BONUS RULE:
-If at any time, four of the same number card (four of a kind) are played, all players except the one who played the fourth card must draw one card. THIS INCLUDES any players who have already won. The AY CALIENTE! (& the BUENOS DIAS! if applicable) must draw one card and rejoin the game. Their status is revoked and game continues.

OTHER PENALTIES:
-Saying AY YI YI! when an AY YI YI! has not been played results in the offending player drawing one card.

For multiple players, other Spanish phrases are encouraged for the tiering.

This game can be played with 3 to any number of people. One deck is suggested per four players.

M79

"Yoouh are the asshuhle, I am the remembererrrr. WON TUUH THREE FAUHR!"


[five minutes later.]

"Who is the rememberer?"
"WON TUUH THREE FAURH!"

Urinetown?

So I just got here to make a huge long post telling some story, but then I decided not to. But then I felt bad about getting on the blog without posting, so I think we should make a new law.
"A person is not allowed to log on to the bathroom blog without making a post."

Sincerely,
Victoria.

Casmir Pulaski Day

This is the shit that went down tonight
1. luise's goal: invagination
2. svedka's goal: WHERE ARE ALL THE GIRLS?!??
3. victoria's goal: not to be too annoyed by all the first years.

went to conors party. who is conor? only 1/2 of the bloggers really knew. but by the end of the night, everyone knew the awesomeness of conor.

(victoria's interlude: WHAT IS GOING ON IN LIFE. i am not drunk anymore and i don't know what to do with myself. i need to smoke some weed in order to comprehend my life.)

ok be back later. futher plans are being established.

Sound of Silence

It started with Luise at work sending a text message to Svedka.
We should call some other people. Maybe have a small party at my house? I mean small though...

Svedka goes on texting frenzy for 40 minutes.

Victoria, Madison Wisconsin, and Svedka go to The Stud for some shit food. While there, they dodge questions from Luise's boring, alcoholic, writer roommate, Hemmingway, about the goingsdown of tonight's activitys. No, you may not come over to your own house. Find something else to do.

Meanwhile, Luise is canvasing. As always. It is important to note at this point that earlier in the day, Madison was accosted by a certain environment loving organization while strolling leisurely through a gay area of town. As she claimed to already be a member to avoid the guilt trip such organizations lead, she mentioned their recent firing of our dear Luise after she failed to make her three day quota. Turns out this woman was Luise's former team leader on her first day of work. The world gets smaller, the people get uglier.

After ingesting far too much shit food, Victoria left for work to be swooned by the lovely singing voices of a non-musical conservatory during auditions. Wonderful. Svedka and Madison left for Madison's abode to... do the usual. They then joined forces with Madison's roommate, Flo'Rida. While zoning to articles about Scooby Doo and drug busts in Tennessee (YEA-UH!), Flo'Rida somehow managed to convince Svekda and Madison to accompany her to a variety show/concert her sort-of boyfriend was performing in with his band. After deciding when exactly to leave, the three decided to engage in a round of beer pong before leaving. Madison, tasked with the job of playing for both teams, was having a bomb-ass-mother-fucking night. In one game, Madison made NOT ONE, but TWO behind the back shots. TWO. Praise be to the Gods above.

Meanwhile, Luise is still canvasing.

They decided to take a cab to the variety show/concert so they could finish the beer pong game. And smoke a 'lil more. The three are pretty trashed when they finally arrive. Good times were had. Howver, as they enjoyed the progresssion of the theatrical and musical events, one question remained: How would they get from their current location back to Madison's house to get the beer and then all the way to Luise's? A quick call to Jack solved the problem. Except for the part where they didn't really know where they were and accidentally sent him downtown before realizing that the address they gave him was wrong. Oops. He found them eventually, however, and after a short drive back to Madison's house to get the beer, they were at Luise's, who somewhere between her canvasing and getting home had found enough time to get drunk as fuck.

Yes, since getting home at 10:30, Luise had broken her in Guiness cup, did her dishes and took shots. A lot of them. Victoria had also made her way to the party, as had a large sum of men from the The Institute of Technicalness. Their names: Gypsy, Russia, Mr. X, and Phelps Luck. After a few games of Shit Your Pants, the table turned... literally. It turned into beer pong. Some real janky beer pong.

Meanwhile, Luise is still canvasing... oh wait...

The party progressed. A lot of smoking and drinking was done. Flo'Rida, under the lure of Phelps Luck, was persuaded to play many, many games of beer pong. Too many. That Couple showed up at one point. The night went on... and on... and on... and on... Eventually, Flo'Rida vanished... to the bathroom. And was not seen again by anyone except Madison for a good three hours. The party cleared out eventually, Phelps Luck surely disappointed that his love had chosen the toilet over his dick. Sometimes, Phelps, these choices are not our own, but guided by a higher power. Remember that next time.

As Flo'Rida clung to the can, Svedka, Luise, Jack and Madison entertained themselves by smoking a spliff left by 1/2 of That Couple and by cooking themselves some tasty treats. Like mashed potatoes, cake and scrambled eggs. Eventually, Madison managed to get Flo'Rida off the bathroom floor and onto Luise's couch. Svekda crashed in the big round chair and Madison in the arm chair. Luise and Jack retreated to her room.

Meanwhile, Luise is sti--

8am. All members of the house wake up, if only for brief moments. Madison and a now sort-of coherent Flo'Rida prepare to take a cab home. Svekda and Luise fall back asleep. Flo'Rida, probably still drunk, vomits once again on the side of Luise's building. And in the McDonald's drive through. Finally, the two are home and in their beds and not vomiting.

Luise, back at her own house, was awoken for good at 11am by her upstairs neighbors having very loud and repetitive sex. At noon, all were roused, a wake and bake was had, and Svedka and Luise cleaned the house. They were, of course, late to see the show they were going to at 2pm. After running some errands, it was time to see their next theatrical event of the eve. Once again racing against the clock, they sped to the theatre. Madison, having slept all day from taking care of Flo'Rida all night, was also rushing to get there. Blazed as all hell, the three finally settled into their seats to enjoy the show. And enjoy it they did.

The production ended. The three headed back to Svedka's place so she could shower before they endeavored to the party they'd decided to attend. Svedka, however, decided she was too tired to go out and despite Luise and Madison's constant shouting of minute increments at her, she stayed in. Luise and Madison fled the scene and met up with a bunch of girls with whom they would go to the party. Though it started out small and sober, the keg lended itself well to them that night. And by the end of the night, it was gone.

Around 2am or so, most were ready to go. After a few confusing debacles, Madison took off to the West to head home. As she walked, she got a text message from Luise telling her she was coming with her. Thus, the two went back to Madison's place, smoked the first of the free green and slept.

Around 12:30, Luise woke Madison up when she retrieved her lighter from her room. They bid one another farewell, and headed off on their seperate journeys; Luise to her house and Madison back to sleep. When she finally woke up, she texted Svedka to find her whereabouts. Turns out, Svedka was on her way to Luise's to gather her groceries she had left there. Madison told Svekda to make a pit stop to her place to the two could indulge and then head to Luise's together. After a series of buses and some foot-longs, including a run-in with some high school friends of Svekda, they were at Luise's once again.

Another round of Shit in Your Pants, talk of learning to count cards, a few Michael Phelps jokes and beers by 5:45pm, we find ourselves here. Always here. And that was the neverending weekend.

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_ZmimJGmrUQ

london calling

Luise and Svedka, after buying a pack of cigarettes and a little green, realized that neither of them had a lighter. (Luise's lighter had been commandeered by Jack.) Luise had one box of half filled matches to last them for their evening of festivities. Despite their best attempts for preservation, the matches slowly disappeared and the last one was used for kicking the bowl and also lighting a cigarette. Then they realized that they would be forced to chain smoke because they're only source of fire was the already lit cigarette. If only cigarettes could light weed. Then we'd be in business.

Chain Smoking Commenced.